I Know What You Mean #3

"Mom, they have hamitizer at camp," announced Natalie

(I don't think they were hypnotizing cured pork while at camp.  Rather, I think she was enamored by the sweet-smelling hand sanitizer available in the bathrooms.)


"Natalie, did you know that if you eat too much sugar it will make you viper?" said Noah

(I don't think he meant consuming sugar would transform Natalie into a snake...which is a good thing or else I'd be a 20 ft python by now.  Rather, I think he meant too much sugar would make her hyper).


"Mom, come whiff me," said Natalie while we swam at our community pool.
(I don't think she wanted me to check to make sure she didn't stink.  Rather, I think she wanted me to come with her to the lazy river float.

I Know What You Mean #2

If you are a parent then you are probably well versed in the language of Kidese (kid-EEZ). However, dialects and terms vary greatly among the population of the pint-sized group. Here are this week's  phrases that Natalie has tossed out and I've tried to catch her true meaning.


"Mom, Noah is always giving me nuts!" yelled Natalie
Since Natalie is allergic to peanuts, I'm pretty sure he wasn't trying to give her any legumes. I think she meant Noah quite often makes her nuts.


"Mom, can you help me find Ariel's boobs?" asked Natalie
Although models and celebs are known to change their cup sizes quite regularly, I don't know of any dolls sold by Disney that offer that option.I think she may have meant she needed help finding her mermaid's bikini top.


"Yea, Dad...if you lived in South Africa then you could shoot cantaloupe!" cheered Nat
Although it is difficult to land a good, ripe cantaloupe.  I don't think it requires firearms, only a little thumping with your thumb.  I think she meant to say antelope.


"Mom, did you buy any moo moo's?" inquired Natalie.
Since we don't live in the country and have no room to house a cow, I think she may have meant Moo Tubes -- the sugary snack marketed as push-up yogurt for kids.

I Know What You Mean

Sometimes my kids try to use a word, but it comes out wrong and I have to decipher what the heck they are talking about.  Today's word puzzle was "invisible camel".

After a few minutes I finally figured out what Natalie was trying to say.  Invisible camel is Natalie-speak for camouflage.

Here's a few more I've heard over the years:

dark milk  = chocolate milk  

offtapots   = octopus

prepperbertays = pepperonis

cooked cookies  = homemade chocolate chip cookies

horsey kisses  = Hershey kisses

alligator  = elevator