McDinner Wars

I'm tired of competing with the Gold Arches for my children's taste bud affections.  What is it about a little, smiling red and yellow cardboard box that sends my kids into squeals of delight?  Surely it can't be the food.  It's filled with so much salt that I think it actually anesthetizes their sense of taste.  Maybe it's the factory molded plastic prize so lovingly crafted from China that sends them oohing and ahhhing. Or, it could be the surprise element or desire to "collect them all" that draws them in.  I think kids are innately collectors.  Lord knows my two have collected everything from rocks and rubber bands to bugs and buttons.

So, I've decided that if I can't beat 'em...I'll join them.  I've been in marketing for more than 10 years; I just need to start "repackaging" my offerings to make them more sell-able to my target market.  Starting now, I'm going to invest in cardboard boxes...lots of them.  And when the kids ask, "What's for dinner?” I'll put on my newly purchased visor and smock and say, "Welcome to the F Inn Family Diner -- Where you can have it our way or the highway!  May I take your order?"  Then I will point to the fancy schmancy menu marquee I've invested in. However, instead of burgers and fries, they'll find items like beef and broccoli; roast chicken and sugar snap peas.   A bonus for me is that with all food items served in paper and plastic - I'll be reducing the amount of dishes to clean!  For prizes, I'll just select from the many discarded toys lying under their beds or left forgotten in a drawer and cover them in shrink wrap.  Surprise!  My hook for getting them to return? "Come back!  There's no telling what toys you'll see again!"